Rejecting Rejection

So, it's been only a couple of days since I actively started the job search. I've applied to 10 open positions thus far. Two of those have already rejected me. Over email. Without giving me the courtesy of an interview. This makes me feel really positive and motivated... and spiteful.

Here is the first rejection email I got:

Jennifer,
Thanks for sending your resume our way. While we've opted to interview other candidates for this position, we do sincerely thank you for your interest and wish you success in your job search. We will keep your resume on file, and if you have any questions please don't hesitate to send us an email.
Recruiting Department

A few comments:

• Are you really sincerely thankful that I sent you my resume?
• Who are these other candidates, and what makes them better than me?
• And, I've heard the "we will keep your resume on file" before and I am pretty sure it means "we've permanently deleted your resume from our inbox and have shredded any hard copies we may or may not have printed."

So... I fought back. And by "fought" I mean I wrote a sassy little response. They said to contact them with questions-- I did not hesitate:

Hi,

Thank you for keeping me in the loop (and so quickly) on the status of my application.

I realize my cover letter probably lacked the necessary punch that would be required of someone to work at your organization, but if you have any other constructive feedback about my application and had a moment, would it be possible to send it along?

I am new to the job search after working at the same company for 4+ years, and, quite frankly, can use all of the help I can get.

Also, if you change your mind about the interview, I am still available and I don't think you'd be disappointed. I realize my background in Art/Art History and my experience in Educational Travel doesn't directly correlate to Healthcare Software, but I am still confident I could make it work for the Sales Coordinator position.

Best,

Jennifer

The second rejection letter went like this:

Dear Jennifer,

Thank you for your interest in the Administrator role in our American Paintings department.

After careful consideration, we regret to inform you that you have not been successful on this occasion. We will keep your application on file should an opportunity arise that fits your skills and experience. Also please keep an eye on our website as we post all of our new opportunities there.

We would like to take this opportunity to thank you for your time and wish you every success in your future career.

Kind Regards
Christie’s HR


My thoughts:

• I've seen this rejection letter before. It comes across as nice, but it really means... we didn't even read your resume because we got 1.5 million responses and our boss's daughter's best friend's cousin applied so she got it. She just graduated from NYU and has a nose ring.
• "You have not been successful on this occasion": Please, could you describe my unsuccessfulness a little bit more thoroughly. I am not sure how to be successful when I was forced to upload and edit my resume in your online application system and write my cover letter in a text box.
• They will also keep my application on file. How sweet of them.
• I do appreciate them taking the time to thank me for my time and wish me success. I mean, not everyone realizes how much time and energy it takes to apply for these jobs! If only I could be more successful at it.

Unfortunately, that little gem of a rejection email came from a Do Not Reply email address, so I couldn't send a response.

Until next time....