Sunday 25 November 2007

Junking Out and Gripes of Odd People

Some of you may know the terms "junking out" to mean: stuff your face until you feel sick to your stomach with the most unhealthy, over-processed foods available on the Planet Earth. My mom thinks it means eating half a box of whole wheat crackers with hummus. Or, on another day, it could be eating 2 slices of whole-grain bread with olive oil. True story.

The point of that little nugget of information about my mom is that she is a weirdo. Not in the sense of the creepy-lady-who-lives-next-door-and-you-are-afraid-to-eat-the-cookies-
she-baked-herself kind of weirdo, but the a-little-off-her-rocker-yet-she-looks-so-hip-and-young-and-I-don't-know-
what-to-think weirdo.

Anyway, my mom sends me ideas of what to post here and the latest two ideas she told me I should write about in a post called "Gripes of Odd People or something."

I read her gripes, and I thought they were worth noting:

Gripe Number 1: Baggers at the grocery store.

You know those earth-friendly reusable bags you can now purchase for about a dollar or so at the grocery store? Well, my mom bought a few of those so she could do her part in saving our glorious planet and at the end of one of her latest trips to the grocery store she whipped those bad boys out only for them to be filled with just a few items. So, my mom posed the question to me (and all of you) about why bother with these eco-friendly bags when they are only going to fill them part-way? And maybe, baggers need to go through more extensive training. Here are my thoughts:

Yes, mom, you are absolutely correct. There is no point in filling a reusable earth friendly bag only half full just as there is no reason to plant only half a tree (just trunk, no leaves) or write only half a novel. As for baggers not having enough training? Hmm.. Let me ponder this one a bit more. I am sure that the 16 year old boy who lives in Winchester and works at the Shaw's and makes minimum wage would be happy to spend his Sunday night not watching Blade Runner in his friend's basement but learning the art of bagging groceries. I am sure this young chap would find it such a useful skill, much more important than how to post a successful Onion personal ad. But, if it were the case that they gave extra training on how to properly bag groceries, I do hope they mention that heavy items should go on the bottom, and bread should go on the top. It always frosts my cookies when I find smushed bread under a can of tomatoes in my pink (yup, my reusable tote is not only earth friendly, but the dollar spent on it went to cancer research) eco-bag.

Gripe number 2: Lack of garbage receptacles in Nevers Park in the fall/winter.

According to my mom, there used to be trash bins in the park, now there are none. My mom claims that "dogs still poop in the fall and winter" and people still "eat food? drink coffee?!" in the fall and winter and "yet the trash barrels are gone."

The HORROR! I cannot believe the Town of South Windsor would remove the trash barrels in the park. What is their reasoning? I am likely to believe that it is all a conspiracy against my mom and her needs, however, I have to wonder... Do dogs really still poop in the winter? And do people still eat food and drink coffee in the park? I can't be sure. On this one, I think it is a toss up. Maybe they were correct to remove unnecessary trash bins because maybe people and dogs hibernate in the winter and don't use the park as their own personal toilets and garbage bins.

In other news, I am still 48,000 words behind on my novel writing. But, I did come up with a way to complete my last item on the to-do-list. It involves Christmas tree lights and ingenuity. Details on that will come one week and 48,000 words later.

Cheers,
J to the E-N-N

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I can confirm that dogs do still poop in the winter.

And that I'm only slightly less crazy than your mom!

Diane

marmie said...

woohoo!!! I once again made Janie's blog! which means...I shall return on my quest of blog blather...til another day (glad you explained what my weirdness truly means. I'd hate to be classified as a GREG....ugh!!!! Ew!!!)

Anonymous said...

did I really leave that whole comment? I don't even know what a GREG is, and I never say ew!!!
did someone AD LIB to my blog identity???