Number 6: I make lists/ Don't complete

I love making lists. I just recently picked up my new weekly planner for the year, and I purposely picked the red moleskine that has is a datebook and a journal... meaning, after every week there is a blank page for thoughts, ideas, and lists.

Everyday when I get into work I make a list. Halfway through the day, I make a second list. During meetings in between doodling and listening, I make another list of all the things I should be doing instead of sitting in a pointless meeting. I have a notepad that is devoted to listmaking and divided into sections like Tasks, Correspondence, Errands. I have a second notepad for list making that includes a section for Time Wasters and has an image of Dwight Shrute in the upper left corner.

Before I leave for the day, I consult all my lists and make a new list of all the things I didn't do but should do tomorrow. Then I make a shopping list on a post-it and attach it to my wallet. For the last 3 days this shopping list has said "Toothpaste, toilet paper, shampoo." Fortunately for me, I have a stock pile of travel gear, which includes mini tubes of toothpaste, mini bottles of shampoo, and even mini packs of toilet paper a friend gave me before I went to Costa Rica, because even though my "wallet list" is there stating exactly what I need, I haven't stopped at the store on the way from work, except for the day I thought I needed Worcestershire's sauce but then didn't.

My list on the side bar has several incomplete items, and that has been existent for a year. My to-do lists at work contain projects that eventually become obsolete, so I convert these projects into "ideas" and write them on J-shaped post its that I attach to my computer only to watch them fall off 4 hours later and collect in a pile in the spot between my keyboard and my monitor, to be sorted through weeks later and thrown in the trash, likely to be resurrected later on a future to-do list. It's a vicious cycle.

Here's the weird part: Most people who are list makers are list makers because they like the satisfaction of a crossing items off the list and the feeling of productivity that comes with throwing out a piece of paper riddled with words and check marks. Me, I like lists because I just like finding order in a chaotic world, for the findings sake alone. It gives me such satisfaction in making a list, making a plan, that I don't actually need to complete it to feel good about myself.

Truth is, I am never going to become the kind of grown up that follows a strict pattern and routine like I mentioned in a previous post. And it isn't because I don't know how or don't know what needs to get done, it's because just knowing is enough for me. I don't need to actually do the things on there. Sure, there are the rare occasions when I have a list and everything on it is crossed off at the end of the day and that's when I squeal in excitement and show everyone proof of my completed tasks. But, the rarity of those days is what makes them special, and I'd like to keep it that way.